


Home

by stuckwithasnakeboy



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Animal Death, Grief/Mourning, Hurt No Comfort, Logic | Logan Sanders is Anxiety | Virgil Sanders' Parent, References to Depression, Teacher Morality | Patton Sanders, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:54:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28497879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stuckwithasnakeboy/pseuds/stuckwithasnakeboy
Summary: She wasn’t coming home and Patton knew that but it still ached and his heart still cried but he was supposed to be over it so why wasn’t he?
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	Home

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Dog mention, death mention

Patton felt like he was different when it came to grief. He didn't exactly go through the steps like he was supposed to. He never denied it. He quickly excepted that this is what happened but all the other staged blended together. Yes, he got angry but it was normally at himself. He always felt guilt and wondered on the "what if"s. Despite his very cheery persona Patton always seemed to be in some state of depression, it always lingered. It didn't always make itself know but it was there.

"I'm gone, ba—"

He caught himself, stopped himself. Patton waited for a moment but no footsteps came toward the door so someone could say goodbye to him before he left. He waited but nothing came.

Realizing that nothing was going to come, he took a shaking breath. He closed his eyes and blinked back the tears. Patton opened the door and paused, wishing that he would hear those footsteps. He backed up and closed the door.

Walking into the living room he quickly spotted it, her blanket. He picked it up off the couch and placed a kiss to it before putting it back in her favorite spot. Then he walked out the door and started his drive.

Autopilot had taken over because the next thing he knew was that he was in a store, standing in front of her favorite snack. He looked at it for a moment before biting his lip and putting it back.

"Mr. Patton!" a small voice called causing him to spin around.

In front of him stood the small, black haired, brown eyed boy he knew as Virgil Casey. He quickly placed on a large smile and adjusted his glasses, "Hello, Virgil. How are you, kiddo?"

The five year old pulled on his jacket. "Okay," he answered.

"That's good. I'm glad to hear that and who is this you're with?" He gestured to the man standing behind Virgil.

He was tall and had the same black hair as Virgil though his eyes were blue not a dark brown. He wore black square-shaped glasses (unlike Patton's golden round ones), a black shirt, and held himself tall unlike Virgil who buried himself under his jacket.

"I'm Logan Casey, Virgil's father," he answered as he looked Patton in the eye with a polite smile.

Granted Logan knew nothing about the man who taught his son, he had only seen him from afar and had never talked to him, but he did know that he didn't look to be in his best spirits. From the little Logan had seen of Patton he seemed very energetic and upbeat. He had never even him without a smile that reached his eyes and he wore bright colors, always accompanied by a grey cardigan either worn normally or tied around his neck. The cardigan was no where to be seen, the smile was no where near close to reaching his eyes (in fact, he had bags under them), all the bright colors had been replaced by dark ones. The only thing colorful that he wore were his golden framed glasses. He looked dreadful.

"Come on, Virgil, I'm sure Mr. Foley has things he needs to get done." Virgil looked up at his father with furrowed eyes when he used Patton's last name instead of first.

Still the boy mumbled a small "okay" before he looked up at Patton. "Mr. Patton, when are you coming back? I miss you and the substitute is mean," he said.

"Hopefully very soon and I'll see if I can get a new sub, okay?" and Virgil nodded before he and his father walked away.

Patton sighed in relief. He didn't know how much longer he could have kept the act up.

Looking back at the box of snacks, he reached to grab it but stopped himself. Yes, she was out but he had to remind himself that she wasn't coming back. His hands fell to his sides and he walked out of the store with only a small bouquet of flowers.

-

Patton collapsed in front of the wind chime he had placed over her. His hands clutched the flowers and he closed his eyes. He should be over it by now, that's what people told him. It had been only two weeks but it didn't matter because according to everyone else she shouldn't be that important.

She was too sick.

It was her time.

She was just a dog.

Just a dog

That's what they always said. "She was just a dog." Had they never lost a pet? Did they not know how painful it was? Did they not care? Of course they didn't! She was just a dog to them!

She was a part of Patton's life. She was the thing he looked forward to coming home to. He loved seeing her big, light brown eyes stare at him. They contrasted so much with her yellow fur which only made them shine even brighter. She always licked his hand when he went to feed her. She always ran to the door when he was about to leave to get one last head rub. She almost always fell over as she raced to the door when he came home. She was a constant and now she was gone.

The toys were still there and so was her blankets. She had left her food bowl full and the same with her water. He should have been there. He should have been with her. If he had only taken her to a vet sooner this wouldn't have happened! He wouldn't have lost her! She would still be there and he wouldn't have to say goodbye to his baby girl. She was only seven for god's sake!

She was gone and it was his fault.

She was gone and it was all his fault.

He placed the flowers over her grave and bowed his head in shame. The tears fell and hit the ground.

"I am so—" he chocked up—"I am so sorry, Sally. I should have been there for you but I wasn't. I was too busy, too caught up in myself to realize and now you're- you're gone and it's all my fault."

He clenched his hands into fists and bit his lip to stop the sob from coming out. He looked at her picture. She looked sad, he didn't have a picture of her where she didn't look sad. Had she ever even been happy?

His eyes squeezed shut, he bit his lips harder, and for a moment his breathing stopped. "I'm sorry, princess. Just please, come home."


End file.
